Rongolian Lonely Hearts Club

Robert “Garfunkle” Davids












Hey Ladies, it’s Garfunkle again, anyone out there in cyberspace looking for some good hot lovin’? I’ve so much time on my hands and my hands are getting tired. Is there just one good lady out there who would come and share my days and fill my nights, my dreams, my fantasies, obsessions, weaknesses, compulsions and fetishes?

I’m a 40-something virgin with a penchant for Jesus. I haven’t done much in my life, I have little real-world experience, but I have a fertile imagination, do what I’m told and I’m a fast learner.  I’m looking for a stern, domineering woman to take charge and tell me what to do. If you have what it takes to make a grown man cry and beg for mercy, call me now, or whenever is convenient for you, 7826XXX, if I’m out, please leave a message with mum and I’ll call you back. I’ve been waiting over 40 years to meat you…please call…I’m rather desperate, so even if you are overweight, hairy, missing a limb, bald, ugly, old or atheist…please call.

My Dream Girl in a Green Dress

Or, if any of the following ladies read my message, you could also call…if you have time…

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***Disclaimer: The Rongolian Lonely Hearts Club is a comedic parody, any resemblance to real persons living or dead is unintentional and purely coincidental.***

About LivinginPeaceProject

Paul Murray is the founder of the LivinginPeace Project. Paul originally from Australia, but have been living in New Zealand for 14 years. Before that he was in Japan for a decade working as a journalist. He met his wife Sanae in Japan and they married in 2008.
This entry was posted in Advertising, Funny, Hilarious, Humor, Humour, Karamea, New Zealand, Parody, Satire, Uncategorized, Weird, West Coast and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Rongolian Lonely Hearts Club

  1. Sheik El Eoukpk III says:

    How come such a good Christian gets all the babes!??!

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