Karamea Ministry of Red Tape: #24

A New Zealand Government Department authorised by a covertly suspicious and deliberately rhetorical Act of Parliament and compounded by a tacit Royal Approval to receive Official Complaints!
 
By Raving Reporter Товарищ Самсон Казаков
 

Office Manager:     Red Scarlett

beautiful-anahi-gonzales-red-dress-1920x1200

Senior Complaints Officer:      Adolf Eichmann Esquire

Office Receptionist:    Miss Triple X!

Tea Strumpet:   Moanika Lewinsky

Office Minstrel:   Rolex Harrasss

Office Muttley:   SuperMoo the Karamea Wonder Dog

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Karamea Ministry of Red Tape offices, Market Cross, Karamea, Friday October 25th 0915hrs

“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM and the Rongo Hit Parade with DJ Hooters!

…..Tie me kangaroo down sport, tie me kangaroo down!
Screw me blue when I’m thru Stew, screw me blue when I’m thru!
Spank me hide when I’m dead Fred, spank me hide when I’m dead!……

Miss Triple X!:     Wow! I just love B and D music!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:    Ist goot song!!

Rolex Harrasss:   I wrote that song after me mother in law got totally shagged by a large Caterpiller digger!

 

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:    Ya??? Playing it again Uncle Samuel!!

Red Scarlett:  Attention!!!!! Ok troops we have our first customer for the day! Combat alert!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:    Raus!!!  Schnell!!!!!

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Bodgie Mactavish:    You’re a complete bastard Jimmy! Oi oi oi!!!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:      Having ze bad hair day kamerad????

Bodgie MacTavish:     Are you a bloody Kraut, Jock????

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:    Ve ask ze qvestions!!!!

Bodgie Mactavish:    I want to make a bloody official complaint!!!!!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:   Regarding vot schwein hundt???

Bodgie Mactavish:   The German bloody football team!! They’re absoloute bloody shite!!!!

KABOOM!!!!!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:     Vanker dumbkopf!!!

Rolex Harrasss:     Skills cobba!!! A precise nasal incision, dissecting his sinuses, severing the carotted artery, exiting the rear temporal lobe and scoring a neat double tops on the office dart board!!!!!

Moanika Lewinsky:    Cup of tea?????

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:   Danke schoen fraulein!!!!


…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM News Flash with DJ Pukeko!!!!

“The Prime Minister of New Zealand, the Right Honourable John Key, National Party Member of Parliament for Remuera and the Minister in charge of the Security Intelligence Service and the Government Communications Services Bureau;  in Wellington today publicly stated  …blah..blah…blah…..:

Karamea Weather with DJ Tokov

“Bonza today! Get out the Barbie and give it a bit of slap and tickle, May the sauce be with you!!!
And now exclusive on Radio Karamea 107.5 FM Rolex Harrasss recorded live on this week’s Rongo 5ooth Blues Show!”

The Big Man:      Do we have to play this turkey???

DJ Crap:      He’ll be good for the ratings!!!

The Big Man:     Naval ratings??

DJ Crap:      Originally recorded by “The Divinyls” the one and only Rolex Harrasss live singing  “I Touch Myself”!!!

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Karamea Ministry of Red Tape offices

Rolex Harrasss:    You know, it was the proudest moment of my life to sing that song personally to Her Majesty the Queen at her Palace Halloween Piggy Party!!!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:    Bringing tears to my eyes kamerad!!!

SuperMoo:    Awwrrooooooooo!!!!

Moanika Lewinksy:        Sniffle……..sniffle……….

Miss Triple X:         Boo hoo!!!

Red Scarlett:    Dear God! I have a serious run in my pantyhose! Do you see me teary eyed!

Rolex Harrasss:    Allow me!!  I am an expert with young ladies hosiery!!!

Red Scarlett:     Et tu Rolex!!!!!!! Get your hand out of my crotch!!!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:   Nein fraulein! Ist goot photo opportunity!!!!!!

FLASH!!!!!!!

Rolex Harass:    Did you get my best side????

Whip……whip…….whip……whip….

Red Scarlett:   Miss Triple X!!!!  Jesus Christ the son of Mary!!!! Why are you whipping SuperMoo???

SuperMoo:    Awwrooooooo!!!!!

Moanika Lewinsky:   Wow!!! I’ve never seen a dog smile before!!!!

“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM

…I’m living on dog food……………”

SuperMoo:       Awwroooooo!!!!

Red Scarlett:     Attention!!! Urgent departmental intelligence briefing now in session!!

Adolf Eichmann Esquire:      Ya!!

Red Scarlett:    Now, I must have your complete and undivided attention!!  Listen very carefully!! The Rongolian Star cryptic crossword, fourteen down..  “A fiery enigma not to be trifled with French heresy!”

Miss Triple X!:     Rubber truncheon!!!

Rolex Harasss:     Two little boys!!!

Moanika Lewinsky:   Cunning linguist!!!!

Red Scarlett:    Thirteen letters!!!

 

Adolf Eichmann  Esquire:       Kamerad Nostradamus’ prophecy…. ARMAGEDDONKOV!!!!

Red Scarlett:   Dolf!!! Brilliant!!!

“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM

“……….I’m Jake ze Peg viz ze extra leg……………….”

Rolex Harrasss:  They’re playing my song!!!!!!!!!!!!

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

 

About LivinginPeaceProject

Paul Murray is the founder of the LivinginPeace Project. www.livinginpeace.com Paul originally from Australia, but have been living in New Zealand for 14 years. Before that he was in Japan for a decade working as a journalist. He met his wife Sanae in Japan and they married in 2008.
This entry was posted in Art, Business, Economics, Education, Erotica, Fashion, Funny, Hilarious, Historical, Humor, Humour, Jesus, Karamea, Karamea Radio, LivinginPeace Project, Media, Moo, Nazis, New Zealand, Parody, Photography, Politics, Religion, Satire, Sex, Social Commentary, SuperMoo the KarameaWonderDog, Uncategorized, United States, Weird and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Karamea Ministry of Red Tape: #24

  1. Yoster says:

    I see a poppy on Rolf Harris’ suit coat! Is he a drug addict too!

  2. George Bush Snr's boyfriend Sebastian. says:

    Adolf Eichmann is such a fag.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s