Office Manager: Red Scarlett
Senior Complaints Officer: Adolf Eichmann Esquire
Office Receptionist: Miss Triple X!
Tea Strumpet: Moanika Lewinsky
Office Minstrel: Rolex Harrasss
Office Muttley: SuperMoo the Karamea Wonder Dog
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Karamea Ministry of Red Tape offices, Market Cross, Karamea, Friday October 25th 0915hrs
“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM and the Rongo Hit Parade with DJ Hooters!
Miss Triple X!: Wow! I just love B and D music!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Ist goot song!!
Rolex Harrasss: I wrote that song after me mother in law got totally shagged by a large Caterpiller digger!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Ya??? Playing it again Uncle Samuel!!
Red Scarlett: Attention!!!!! Ok troops we have our first customer for the day! Combat alert!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Raus!!! Schnell!!!!!
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Bodgie Mactavish: You’re a complete bastard Jimmy! Oi oi oi!!!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Having ze bad hair day kamerad????
Bodgie MacTavish: Are you a bloody Kraut, Jock????
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Ve ask ze qvestions!!!!
Bodgie Mactavish: I want to make a bloody official complaint!!!!!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Regarding vot schwein hundt???
Bodgie Mactavish: The German bloody football team!! They’re absoloute bloody shite!!!!
KABOOM!!!!!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Vanker dumbkopf!!!
Rolex Harrasss: Skills cobba!!! A precise nasal incision, dissecting his sinuses, severing the carotted artery, exiting the rear temporal lobe and scoring a neat double tops on the office dart board!!!!!
Moanika Lewinsky: Cup of tea?????
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Danke schoen fraulein!!!!
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“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM News Flash with DJ Pukeko!!!!
Karamea Weather with DJ Tokov
The Big Man: Do we have to play this turkey???
DJ Crap: He’ll be good for the ratings!!!
The Big Man: Naval ratings??
DJ Crap: Originally recorded by “The Divinyls” the one and only Rolex Harrasss live singing “I Touch Myself”!!!
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Karamea Ministry of Red Tape offices
Rolex Harrasss: You know, it was the proudest moment of my life to sing that song personally to Her Majesty the Queen at her Palace Halloween Piggy Party!!!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Bringing tears to my eyes kamerad!!!
SuperMoo: Awwrrooooooooo!!!!
Moanika Lewinksy: Sniffle……..sniffle……….
Miss Triple X: Boo hoo!!!
Red Scarlett: Dear God! I have a serious run in my pantyhose! Do you see me teary eyed!
Rolex Harrasss: Allow me!! I am an expert with young ladies hosiery!!!
Red Scarlett: Et tu Rolex!!!!!!! Get your hand out of my crotch!!!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Nein fraulein! Ist goot photo opportunity!!!!!!
FLASH!!!!!!!
Rolex Harass: Did you get my best side????
Whip……whip…….whip……whip….
Red Scarlett: Miss Triple X!!!! Jesus Christ the son of Mary!!!! Why are you whipping SuperMoo???
SuperMoo: Awwrooooooo!!!!!
Moanika Lewinsky: Wow!!! I’ve never seen a dog smile before!!!!
“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM
…I’m living on dog food……………”
SuperMoo: Awwroooooo!!!!
Red Scarlett: Attention!!! Urgent departmental intelligence briefing now in session!!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Ya!!
Red Scarlett: Now, I must have your complete and undivided attention!! Listen very carefully!! The Rongolian Star cryptic crossword, fourteen down.. “A fiery enigma not to be trifled with French heresy!”
Miss Triple X!: Rubber truncheon!!!
Rolex Harasss: Two little boys!!!
Moanika Lewinsky: Cunning linguist!!!!
Red Scarlett: Thirteen letters!!!
Adolf Eichmann Esquire: Kamerad Nostradamus’ prophecy…. ARMAGEDDONKOV!!!!
Red Scarlett: Dolf!!! Brilliant!!!
“Radio Karamea 107.5 FM
“……….I’m Jake ze Peg viz ze extra leg……………….”
Rolex Harrasss: They’re playing my song!!!!!!!!!!!!
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The Rongolian Star 
No Jimmy Saville ?
I see a poppy on Rolf Harris’ suit coat! Is he a drug addict too!
Could be…he’s done some crazy shit in his life!
Not this time Jim…
Adolf Eichmann is such a fag.
Really?