Super Moo the Karamea Wonder Dog

By Paul Murray
 
 

The Buller District Council classified “Moo” as a “dangerous dog” after an alleged incident that occurred in 2006 when he was about a year old.

Paul in 2004

Moo in 2004 Age 1 Principle Interest: Stick Chasing

I had to go to Greymouth and he really wanted to come with me, but I was unable to take him, so I tied him up in front of my house with a bone and a bowl of water and arranged for a friend (Brian) to come by and collect him after I had gone.

Between the time I left and Brian arriving, a local woman walked by and saw Moo looking a bit down in the mouth and approached him. Every dog manual in the world states that you should never approach lone dog on a chain, but that aside, she apparently tired to pat him and he allegedly nipped her on the leg resulting in a bruise on her inner thigh…there were no teeth marks and the skin was not broken, so it was hardly a viscous attack, if indeed it happened at all. It’s also likely that Moo felt threatened, and that he was protecting his bone and his territory…and my property.

Dangerous Dog on the Loose…QUICK…Call the Council!

I now know that the woman in question has a reputation for being somewhat economical with the truth and was later convicted of theft and fraud for stealing money from her employer. If indeed Moo did nip the woman, it is unfortunate, but I’m not convinced it even happened and I should have counter-charged her for trespass…However, I chose to face the music, man up and take responsibility for my actions and my dog and face the consequences…BIG mistake.

As a result of the alleged “attack” I was branded by the Council as am “irresponsible dog owner” and Moo as a “dangerous dog.” Of course I contested the ruling and I was invited to a “hearing” at the Biller District Council in Westport, which meant I had to travel to Westport in my own time and expense to attend the hearing.

On arrival, I met with the Senior Dog Control Officer and was shown to a small backroom where I met two Councillors. The first, who’s name was (I kid you not) John Lennon, who was a real estate agent and the other, Margaret Montgomery, owns a holiday park.

Moo and Friends 2007

It was evident from the get go that whatever I said, whatever evidence I submitted in Moo’s defence, any counter argument, reasoning or plea was not going to change the Council ruling, so it was in fact a total farce and the “hearing” was a further waste of my time and money and an entirely pointless exercise. Out of frustration and maddened by the absurd allegations and the obstinacy of the Councillors, I said, “OK, John, you’re a real-estate agent and Margaret, you own a holiday park, what qualifications do either of you have to determine the nature of a dog?” “Surely I am equally as qualified as either of you, especially as I am familiar with the dog…neither of you have even seen him!”

Mee’n’Moo 2007

That got me to the next level, it was like a computer game, I had got past stage 1 and I now got to meet a guy called Terry Archer, who has a title something like “Senior Compliance Officer,” or something like that. Terry agreed that the two esteemed Councillors lacked the requisite qualifications to assess the character of a dog, but the bad news for me was that once the Council had made a ruling and that it had been upheld at a hearing, there was no further recourse, meaning that the Council’s ruling was the last word and I there was no other legal avenue open to me, I couldn’t take it to court as the Council had the jurisdiction to make a final ruling on the matter and the court would not hear the case.

I had to accept the ruling, which had all sorts of additional ramifications, such as Moo was now classified as a “dangerous dog” and I an “irresponsible dog owner,” his dog registration fees now incurred a 150% surcharge, he was required to be castrated, micro-chipped, restrained at all times, walked only on a lead and when muzzled.

Moo is not a Pitt-bull terrier, a Mastiff, a Rottweiler or a Mountain Lion…he’s a Border Collie! He likes chasing balls, retrieving sticks, working the sheep, lot of exercise, activity, mental challenge and having his tummy scratched…he is a spirited, intelligent, friendly, funny and loyal friend to myself and many people from around the world. He is an icon at Rongo Backpackers, as is trained to lead people on walks around the Karamea Estuary…he even has his own FaceBook Page (https://www.facebook.com/supermoo.thekarameawonderdog), which wasn’t started by me, it was made by one of his many friends and he now has 370 FaceBook followers…I ask you dear reader, if this dog was in any way dangerous, do you really think this would be the case?

Dangerous Dog on the Loose…QUICK…Call the Council!

The latest harassment from the Buller District Council is a $300 fine for Moo being walked off lead and unmuzzled…I consider it my civic duty to refuse to pay this fine and to defend my dog yet again against this repressive and patently ludicrous ruling…stupid laws should be broken, please write a few words in support of Moo, so that I might take it to the Council and finally get some closure on this madness…By the Way, Moo is now eight years old (which is 56 in human years), he’s more interested in sleeping in the sun and chewing his bone than attacking anything…he is not dangerous, he’s not a threat to anyone or anything…many of you reading this will know Moo…please take a few moments to write in support of his freedom…I refuse to restrain and muzzle my old loyal friend, I instead want to give him a peaceful end to his happy life to thank him for all the joy he has given us…please tell the Buller District Council what time it is…COMMON SENSE TIME!

Gallery of Photos of Moo NOT being Dangerous (I have thousands more and not one of them shows Moo being aggressive or threatening in any way)

FREE MOO!!

 

 

 

Moo is a LivinginPeace Project treasured icon, he has helped our business and given our many customers a great time when they were staying with us…please add your comments below in support of Moo and let the Buller District Council know in no uncertain terms that enough is enough….FREE SuperMOO!!

Posted in Buller District Council, Business, Karamea, LivinginPeace Project, Moo, New Zealand, Permaculture, Photography, Politics, Social Commentary, SuperMoo the KarameaWonderDog, Travel, Uncategorized, West Coast | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 130 Comments

The Mirror Tarn: ArtofNature Photography by Paul Murray

When Up is Down: Paul Murray

The Mirror Tarn is one of my favourite places. The tarn (small mountain lake) is surrounded by dense beech forest that protect the surface of the water from even the slightest breeze. The tarn is very deep and the water is stained a dark tea hue from the tannins released from the beech-tree leaves and appears jet black. The surface of the tarn forms a perfect mirror of the sky and makes for some very interesting photographic opportunities. 

The first image was shown in an exhibition I did in Tokyo many years ago and was very popular with the Japanese. The subsequent images are taken with a 300 zoom across the tarn to where the forest meets the water. I love the imagery and the enhanced abstract nature of the photographs when they are rotated…each angle gives the photos new interpretation. 

The Mirror Tarn is in the Oparara Basin in Karamea on the West Coast of the South Island of New Zealand

Posted in Art, Department of Conservation, DOC, Kahurangi National Park, Karamea, LivinginPeace Project, New Zealand, Oparara, Photography, West Coast | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Booker James: Maharajah of the Bayou

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Booker James

By Greg Johnson

New Orleans. The city’s name just brings to mind music. Jazz and R&B are almost synonymous with its history. And, so are piano players. From the 19th Century classical composer,Louis Morreau Gottschalk, Storyville sporting house players, Tony Jackson and Jelly Roll Morton, R&B greats Fats Domino, Allen Toussaint and Huey Smith, bluesier artists Champion Jack Dupree and Professor Longhair, to modern masters such as Harry Connick Jr. and Dr John, they have always held the center of attention.  But, of them all, perhaps no one individual led a more eccentric or erratic life than James Booker. Haunted by mental health disorders and heavy drug addiction, the promising career of perhaps the Crescent City’s most talented pianist came to an all too sad and early end.

James Carroll Booker III was born in New Orleans on December 17, 1939. His father was a one-time dancer from Bryan, Texas, who decided to change his life’s work by becoming a Baptist minister and relocating to New Orleans.  His mother had been raised in Mississippi and she was a member of the Baptist church Gospel choir. With such a strong religious influence, it is not surprising that as a child, James‘ desire was to become a priest when he grew older.

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While still an infant, James and his sister Betty Jean were sent to live with their aunt in Bay St. Louis, Mississippi.  It was noted at a very early age that J. C. (as his family knew him) had musical skills. By the age of six, he was already playing the piano, learning classical music, as well as the styles of pianists ArchibaldProfessor Longhair and family friend, Tuts Washington. At the age of 10, he asked his mother for a trumpet.  Instead, she purchased a saxophone for him.  This did not upset young J.C. as he was still able to teach himself musical scales on the instrument.

That same year, James was struck by a speeding ambulance and dragged for nearly 30 feet.  His leg was broken in eight places.  As a result he would forever walk with a limp.  But, even worse, he was given morphine for the pain.  This was an early introduction to drugs, which would play a hard role throughout his life.

Booker’s father died in 1953 and he was returned to New Orleans along with his sister to live with their mother. Enrolled at Xavier Preparatory School, he was classmates with Allen Toussaint and Art Neville.  He was a very intelligent student, especially in math, Spanish and music classes.  And, while still in school, he put together his first band, Booker Boy and the Rhythmaires, which also included Neville.

During this same time, his sister Betty Jean was performing as a Gospel singer on radio station WMRY every Sunday afternoon. James began to frequent the studio while his sister was on the air.  Soon the station managers discovered that he could play the piano and James became a regular performer himself on a Jazz and Blues show which aired on Saturdays. He was quite impressive, often performing complicated numbers by composers such as Bach and Rachmaninoff.  Eventually, the entire Booker Boy and the Rhythmaires became the featured artists on the show.

The broadcasts also caught the attention of Imperial Records‘ renowned producer, Dave Bartholomew. He invited the band to audition and shortly afterwards they recorded the single, “Doing The Hambone.” Booker at 14 was the youngest artist ever to record for the label. The single did not sell very well, but Bartholomew saw promise in the young pianist.  In particular with his ability to play in the styles of many of the popular artists of the time.  One of Imperial’s biggest stars was Fats Domino, who was in demand for live appearances constantly.Bartholomew decided to put Booker in the studio to record the piano tracks for Fats Domino, so when he returned home, all the hit-maker would need to do was to lay down the vocal parts.

Booker’s talents were also noticed by Paul GaytenChess Records‘ A&R man and a performer himself.  He decided to try his luck with James and scheduled a session for Booker and Art Neville. They were to be billed as Arthur and Booker, but Neville was unable to make the date and was replaced by Arthur Booker (no relation to James). The single “Heavenly Angel” was released, but much like “Hambone“, it did not catch on either.

Over the next few years, James took on work with many of the popular bands of the day. Unlike Fats Domino’s constant life on the road, Huey “Piano” Smith did not like to travel at all.  Again, because of James‘ gift for sounding like other performers, he went on tour throughout the South making appearances as Huey Smith.  It was a win-win situation for both of them and sometimes he even performed local gigs when Smith accidentally double-booked himself. James also did several tours with people like Earl King, Shirley & Lee and Joe Tex.

Through Joe Tex, Booker was introduced to producer, Johnny Vincent, who signed him to a three-year contract with Ace Records. But, the partnership did not last long. Booker had recorded “Teenage Rock” and “Open The Door” for Ace, but still did not receive much fanfare. A third number was recorded and Booker discovered Vincent dubbing it with Joe Tex’svocals over his own. That was enough for him and he dissolved their contract based on the grounds that he was under-aged and could not legally sign it for himself.  Disenchanted with the recording industry, Booker left New Orleans and enrolled in Baton Rouge’s Southern University in 1960.

 

But, involvement with heavy drugs began to take its toll on Booker during this period also. So he returned to performing in order to make money to supply his habit. Traveling to Houston, he began working for Don Robey at the Duke/Peacock label. He recorded an organ-driven instrumental single tided, “Gonzo,” named for a character in the film “The Pusher.”  The single hit the charts on November 13, 1960, and remained there for 11 weeks, peaking at number 43.  Unfortunately, it would be the only time in his career where he would chart as a solo performer.

Throughout the 1960s, James Booker would work with a number of reputed artists on tour and in the studio. Among these were Little Richard, Bobby Bland, Junior Parker, Lloyd Price, Wilson Pickett and B.B. King. He traveled to New York, where he recorded for Atlantic Records with Jerry Wexler, on albums by King Curtis and Aretha Franklin (who includedBooker’s own composition, “So Swell When You’re Well“). Wexler also spent time recording James as a solo artist, but these tracks have never been released.

During the late 1960s, Booker also worked with his life-long friend, Mac Rebennack, known better as Dr. John. The two had known each other since the 1950s, often working together in Cosimo Matassa’s New Orleans studios with Dave BartholomewBooker’s stage presence started becoming more eccentric also, wearing wigs, capes, eye patches and even a glass eye for his missing left orb.  The story behind his lost eye varies, depending on who tells it.  Some say it was drug-related, but Dr. John claims in his autobiography that Booker lost the eye after pulling a scam on some record producers they’d written arrangements for. Booker had somehow conned the producers into paying for their services three times and was pushing his luck with a fourth attempt.  The producers caught on though and had Booker beaten up so badly that he lost the eye. Booker was said to comment afterward, “If I lost the other eye, too, then I might be able to play as well as Ray Charles or Art Tatum.

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Booker was always a handful for Dr. John.  He consistently upstaged the other performers in the band and was quite open with his homosexuality, often hitting on those assigned to share his room or to bringing men to the room who he picked up on the road, much to the horror of his roommates.  Drugs also took their toll on his dependency to make shows.  Finally, Dr. Johnhad enough and released Booker, giving him two-weeks pay.  Dr. John claims that once he left the band, James went to Joe Tex, Fats Domino and Marvin Gaye each and agreed to take a role in their respective bands. He was given two-weeks advance pay from each, only to run off back to New Orleans.

There his life took a drastic change. Outside of the city’s famed Dew Drop InnBooker was arrested for possession of heroin and was sentenced to serve two years at Angola Prison. While an inmate, he worked in the prison’s library and also developed a musical program within the system. His efforts paid off and he was granted parole after only serving six months. When he returned to New Orleans, he found that the music scene had hit a slump and was not very prosperous. Seeking work, he violated his parole by leaving the state.

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Booker returned to New York, where he worked as session musician and recorded with people such as Ringo Starr, Maria Muldaur and the Doobie BrothersJerry Wexler also recordedBooker’s vocals for the soundtrack of “Pretty Baby” on the Jelly Roll Morton song, “Winin’ Boy Blues.” After spending two years in New York, he moved around the country settling in locations such as Dovington, Pennsylvania (near Philadelphia), Cincinnati and Los Angeles. While in L.A., he did sessions with both Charles Brown and T-Bone Walker.  In 1973, he recorded sides in L.A. with a group of fellow New Orleans musicians who had relocated to the city.  That session would be released 24 years later, 14 years following his death, as the “Lost Paramount Tapes.”

Eventually, the charges for his parole violation were lifted and Booker returned to New Orleans in 1975.  He appeared at that year’s Jazz and Heritage Festival where he drew the attention of record scouts. Booker was suddenly regarded as the talented musician that he was. He began tutoring a young politician’s son by the name of Harry Connick, Jr., whom Booker saw a resemblance to himself as a child prodigy.  He recorded the album “Junco Partner” for the Island label in 1976 and it received praise from many critics with its fine showing of Booker’sdexterity, performing music ranging from Chopin to Earl King, alongside his own material (something that came quite easily for Booker, as he often combined classical and modern music in his stage act, as well, often within the same song).

 

This also led to Booker’s traveling to Europe for the first time to appear in several festivals. His performance at the Boogie Woogie and Ragtime Piano Contest in Zurich, Switzerland was recorded in 1976 and released as “New Orleans Piano Wizard: Live!”  The recording was a triumph for Booker, honored with the Grand Prix de Disque de Jazz award as best live album in 1977.  He followed that up with more European shows the next year, including the illustrious Montreux International Jazz Festival.

 

But, when Booker returned home, he was a changed man.   He no longer adorned the extravagant capes or eye patches and his mental condition was beginning to fail. He often checked himself into the mental ward at New Orleans’ Charity Hospital. By the 1980s, his shows were becoming more and more erratic. Though he was now a featured performer at the Maple Leaf Bar, working with the astounding team of Johnny Vidacovich on drums, bass player John Singleton and saxophonist Alvin “Red” Tyler, the shows did not always come across. When they did, Booker was arguably the best the city had ever seen (captured magnificently on the posthumous releases, “Resurrection Of The Bayou Maharajah” and “Spiders On The Keys“).  But, too often, he would refuse to play, or would walk off-stage mid-set and occasionally even vomited onto his own piano keys.  The crowds began to disappear.

Rounder Records decided to record Booker in 1982.  The sessions almost seemed doomed before anything even took place. A week prior to the session dates, Booker collapsed in a seizure and was admitted to Charity Hospital. His condition seemed to worsen and he was transferred to Southern Baptist Hospital where it was determined that his liver had suffered irreparable damage after years of alcohol and drug abuse. Miraculously, he recovered in time to make the recording dates. But, the first day he refused to play, the second he appeared unable to; and, on the third, he returned in spirits as if he had never been sick in his life and laid down more than enough tracks for the album that would become “Classified.”  Two days later,Booker disappeared, only to be found several days later jailed for disturbing the peace.

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Booker tried to take on a more acceptable life-style. He took a job with City Hall as a clerk typing and filing in 1983.  But, he soon began drinking again despite his liver ailment and lost the job. He still had his Maple Leaf gigs, but he began missing them altogether. The last show he performed there was on October 31, 1983, with only five patrons in attendance. For the next show on November 7th, he didn’t show up at all.

On November 8, 1983James Booker took a deadly dose of low-grade cocaine and passed out.  He was driven to Charity Hospital and left in the emergency waiting room in a wheelchair where he sat undiscovered for probably half an hour. When he was checked on, he was already dead, having suffered heart and lung failure. He was only 43 years old.

New Orleans is known for its elaborate funeral processions.  Especially when it comes to its beloved musicians. The funeral for James Carroll Booker III was sparsely attended with very little floral arrangements. He was laid to rest in a family plot at Providence Memorial Park in nearby Metarie, Louisiana.  A sad farewell for a musician now honored as one of New Orleans’ true piano geniuses, regarded perhaps only second to Professor Longhair.

(Article Courtesy of February, 2002 BluesNotes)
 
 

Posted in Art, Blues, Education, Historical, Music, Photography, Social Commentary | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Accidental Multi-Millionaire Leo Gao: Kiwi Hero

What would you have done if you were Leo Gao?

Leo Gao: Accidental Multi-Millionaire

Off the Top of my Head

By Paul Murray
 

What would you have done if you were Leo Gao?

After battling away for years working hard as a small business owner, struggling to make ends meet…working 15 hours a day and going backwards financially, Chinese migrant Hui Leo Gao approached his bank for an overdraft facility of $100,000 to cover a seasonal downturn in his business cash flow.

Instead, due to a Westpac Bank clerical error, his account was credited with 100 times the amount he requested. Imagine yourself in his shoes…suddenly all the stress, tension and worry is gone, your account is now $10,000,000 in the black and you’re on easy street.

Pennies from heaven, but hang on, the money isn’t yours, surely there has been a mistake…I should alert the bank to their error and return the money…or would I perhaps missing a great opportunity…everything happens for a reason…should I take the money and run? Gao was in a quandary, his honest nature suggested he should fess up and take it on the chin, but he also couldn’t help thinking about the benefits of the unexpected windfall…the opportunity to change his life forever.

Gao claims to have felt as if he was being set up, why was this happening to him? Who was behind the digital fortune now in his possession? Was it real? was the money really in his account? He decided to go to the bank, to verify his account balance and to at least give them the chance to spot the error…put the ball in Westpac’s court. He went into his branch, the one he’d been banking at for years and approached a teller, with whom he’d likely dealt with before. He joked with her that his financial situation had significantly improved since his last visit to the bank…the teller must have seen the bank balance, but did not register or question that there was suddenly an unusually large amount of money in Gao’s account.

Gao’s situation was exacerbated by his father’s gambling addiction, which depleted his families’ coffers…a problem that Gao claims afflicts many New Zealand migrants who find themselves in a culture that is alien and exclusive to them.

Gao decided not to look his gift horse in the mouth and began to transfer money into offshore bank accounts. He shifted $6.7 million out of his account and then flew to Hong Kong to join his jackpot. On arrival, he found that his life was not exactly as he imagined it might be. The New Zealand Government, N.Z. Police, Interpol and presumably the SIS were hunting him…life as a multi-millionaire on the lam was even more tense, stressful and traumatic than pumping gas in Rotorua.

Gao decided to give himself up and do the time for his “crime.”

An excellent question would be…just how much money did the New Zealand Government spend on trying to recover money inadvertently lost by an Aussie bank? Ask yourself, how much responsibility did Westpac take for a) Making a banking error and b) Not spotting the error when given the opportunity to do so.

Gao stated in a recent TVNZ interview that he and his fellow migrants had few Kiwi friends and found it difficult to assimilate into New Zealand life…addressing this problem would surely have been a better way to spend N.Z. Govt money rather than funding an international chase to recover money laxly lost by a foreign corporation that last year made a profit of $AU6 billion.

Given the amount of money banks and bankers fleece from us on a daily basis, I think Gao did what any reasonable man would have done; take the money and run. Gao must have had a pretty good time and fair play to him…most of the money has been accounted for, but about $3 million has mysteriously vanished…he’s now back in New Zealand, manning up, facing the music and doing his time…the missing millions? Hopefully, safely stashed away for his release…Mr Gao, you are my Robin Hood.

Runaway millionaire ‘spent’ remaining $3.8m

Sunday August 26, 2012 Source: ONE News

Runaway millionaire 'spent' remaining $3.8m  (Source: ONE News)

Runaway millionaire Leo Gao. – Source: ONE News

Watch Video

Leo Gao  (Source: ONE News)

Runaway millionaire speaks out (15:20)

The man known as the runaway millionaire says he spent the $3.8 million outstanding from the $10m accidentally transferred into his bank account.

Hui Leo Gao and former girlfriend Kara Hurring were sentenced on Friday in the Rotorua District Court after the couple fled to China in April 2009 when a $10m overdraft was mistakenly loaded into Gao’s bank account.

Gao has been sentenced to four years and seven months in prison while Hurring received nine months home detention.

The majority of the money was recovered after Gao’s bank accounts were frozen, but police say close to $4m is still missing.

Gao told TV ONE’s Sunday he spent the remaining $3.8m while he was on the run, on “everybody, everything”.

“Everybody’s been asking me the same question. I don’t know the answer.”

Gao said he did not buy anything luxurious with the money.

However, Detective Inspector Mark Loper said he thought Gao was trying to divert police.

“The obvious answer is that he’s got the money and he knows where it is.

“I believe the money has been through some relatives’ accounts. I believe he has access to that money in China.”

Loper said police still hoped to track the money down. Westpac is continuing to dedicate considerable resource to recover the stolen money.

‘Biggest mistake of my life’

Gao told Sunday he was not a criminal and taking the money was the “biggest mistake” of his life.

“If I had a chance I wouldn’t do it again.”

The 31-year-old moved to New Zealand from China ten years ago. He bought a petrol station in Rotorua as a way to turn his fortune around.

In 2009, Gao asked Westpac for a $100,000 overdraft to pay bills, when the $10m was accidentally loaded into his account.

“It’s like Santa Claus gave me a gift.”

A few days after the banking error, the pair travelled to Auckland, where Gao used remittance companies to transfer the funds, up to $500,000 at a time, to Hong Kong banks.

A week later he left for Hong Kong to meet his parents at Macau and reunited with Hurring.

Hurring was arrested when she returned to Auckland in February 2011 to renew her daughter’s passport. The 33-year-old was found guilty by a Rotorua jury in May of 30 charges of theft, attempting to dishonestly use a bankcard, and money-laundering totalling $256,000.

Gao, 31, was extradited from Hong Kong in December 2011 after he was arrested by border police as he tried to cross from mainland China.

He later pleaded guilty in June to seven charges of theft totalling $6.7m that he had transferred to offshore accounts in Macau and Hong Kong.

Gao said he was now trying to put the saga behind him and build a new life.

“I have to accept it, there’s nothing I can do.

“[Things] can’t get any worse.”

Posted in Banking, Business, Economics, Funny, Hilarious, Historical, Humor, Humour, Money, New Zealand, Politics, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Visit the Top of the West Coast

<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/47853932″>Welcome to the Buller District – Top of the West Coast. New Zealand</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/westcoastfilm”>WestCoastFilm</a&gt; on <a href=”http://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

Posted in Kahurangi National Park, Karamea, New Zealand, Travel, West Coast | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Karamea Ministry of Red Tape #15

A New Zealand Government Department authorised by a rhetorically ambiguous and a covertly fictitious Act of Parliament and compounded by a tacitly implied Royal Approval to receive Official Complaints.
 

Office Manager:    Red Scarlett beyonce-red-dress-695x1024

Senior Complaints Officer:    Iggy Popsicle

Office Receptionist:    IQ 36DD

IQ 36DD

Tea Babe:   Babe!!!!!

 

Office Superhero:    Super Moo The Karamea Wonder Dog

Super Moo The Karamea Wonder Dog

Karamea Ministry of Red Tape Office, Market Cross, Karamea: Monday April 1st 2012

Karamea Ministry of Red Tape Office

 

Super Moo:    Arf arf!

Rabbinnical Bratwurst III:   Shalom o cute and fluffy doggie woggie!

Rabbinnical Bratwurst III

Super Moo:    Huh huh huh huh huh!

Rabbinnical Bratwurst III:   Is it safe to pat this friendly canine?

Iggy Pospicle:   Are Tottenham Hottiespurs going to win this year’s World Series???

Rabbinnical Bratwurst III:  Nice doggie! Nice doggie! Have I arrived at the proper office forthwith to make complaint?

Iggy Popsicle:    An official complaint???

Rabbinnical Bratwurst III:   Most certainly my son!

Iggy Popsicle:    Please state your complaint!

Rabbinnical Bratwurst III:   I wish to record an official compliant about the modern youth of society and their complete idolatry of and total addiction associated with Face Book.

Beep beep!!

Red Scarlett:     What T(censored) Fuck!!!!  Ahem! Ah …Red Scarlett, Karamea Ministry of Red Tape Office Manager! This better be of vital international importance!

 

Iggy Popsicle:

Yes boss. At the counter is Sheik……

Rabbinnical Bratwurst:    Rabbi……

Red Scarlett:    Rabbies!!

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Kaboom!!!

Red Scarlett:   Great work Iggy! Now make sure Super Moo doesn’t eat any of the vital organs from his rabid corpse. Moo is the star guest at Show and Tell at Karamea Kindy tomorrow. Don’t want him barfing on the kiddies!

Super Moo:     Salivate!  Slobber!  Slurp!

IQ 36DD:       Nooo Super Moo!  Noooo!

Super Moo:     Gobblemunchasnacka!!!!

Babe!!!:    Aaaaaagggggghhhhhhhhh!!!!

Iggy Popsicle:  Stop being hysterical! What ever’s wrong?

Babe!!!:     Aaaaaaaaaaaggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!! I just remembered I forgot to wear my wonder bra and suspenders belt when I had a snifter with the vicar behind the bike shed last night!!!

Iggy Popsicle:    Now think hard!

Babe!!!:     Mmmmmm!!!

Iggy Popsicle:   Were you wearing your wonder bra and suspender belt when you met the vicar?

Babe!!!:    Ok, I remember now I was!!  But ..but .. I arrived home without them!!

Iggy Popsicle:   Ok, ok let us retrace your steps!!! Where did you go after rendezvousing with the Vicar???

 

Babe!!!:     I went skinny dipping by myself at Flagstaff Beach by the moonlight!!

Iggy Popsicle:     Were you wearing your .. gulp…  wonderbra and ahem … suspender belt when you went skinny dipping.… ???

Super Moo:    Huh huh huh huh huh huh!

Babe!!!:     I had my suspender belt on but not my wonder bra!!

Iggy Popsicle:    Mysterious!!!!!??? So, in between having a sly old snog with the vicar, you lost your wonder bra somewhere in the Karamea Triangle!

Babe!!!:     Yes???

IQ 36DD:     Aaaaaaaaggggghhhhhhhhhhh!!!

ankle-marilyn-monroe-tattoo

 

Iggy Popsicle:    Hysterical women!!! Now what???

IQ 36DD:    I forgot to put any money in my car park meter!!!

Iggy Popsicle:    Hey look in this guy’s wallet!  500 sheikles and a Mossad ID card!

IQ 36DD:  The meter only takes coins!!

Red Scarlett:   What is all the commotion out here???

IQ 36DD:    Look out the window!  The Meter Major!!!!

 

Kaboom!!!

Iggy Popsicle:     Rats!! Missed!!!

Babe!!!:     Ai Caramba!@!  You shot the sherriff!!!

Kaboom!!!! Kaboom!!!

Babe!!!:        OMIGAWD! You shot the deputy!!!  Noooooooooooooooooooooo!

Red Scarlett:   Red Alert!! Crisis meeting right now!!! Troops ‘shun!

YES Madame!!!

Iggy Pop:         I see nuzzing, I know nuzzing!!!

Babe!!!:        I plead the 53rd!!!

IQ 36DD:            I need a valium!!!

 

Super Moo:        Shize strasse!!!

Red Scarlett:    Ok I need you all to stay cooool, calm and collectively alert! Now listen very very very carefully!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Seventeen down  …. A prehistoric flying carnivore friendly with the Immortal Bard??

grier_01

Iggy Popsicle:    Pteradactyllic hexameter!

Red Scarlett:    Ok fifteen down….

Super Moo:      Awarooooooooooo!

Red Scarlett:    Indigestion! I’m not surprised!! Super Moo you genius!!!! Fifteen down … intestinal eruption…ten letter word starting with f!!!! Flatulence!!!

Super Moo:      Arf arf!

Red Scarlett:    Ok last one, then we’ll tidy up that remaining rabid left toenail!

Banana Moosecurry:    Amazing Grace……..

Kaboom!!!

Red Scarlett:     Chocolate muffin fit for a King Kong!!

Babe!!!:      Boo hoo! I’m no good at cryptic crosswords!!

Red Scarlett:     You silly trollop! I want a chocolate muffin for morning tea!!

Babe!!!:     Two sugars????

Red Scarlett:    Eureka!!! Twenty eight across! Number of snipers who shot JFK from the grassy troll!

Lady in red

Super Moo:   Arf arf!

Posted in Art, Funny, Heaphy Track, Hilarious, Humor, Humour, Karamea, LivinginPeace Project, New Zealand, Parody, Photography, Politics, Satire, Social Commentary, Weird, West Coast | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Rongo Heroes: Vidoes By PassitOn Films

Paul Murray: LivinginPeace Project Founder

<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/47384586″>Paul Murray, Rongo Hero</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/passiton”>PassitOn</a&gt; on <a href=”http://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

Dave Tailby: Permaculture Farm Manager

<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/47393940″>DaveTaiby RongoHero</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/passiton”>PassitOn</a&gt; on <a href=”http://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

Brian “Big Man” Thomson: General Manager

<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/47391216″>TheBigMan, Rongo Hero</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/passiton”>PassitOn</a&gt; on <a href=”http://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

Lewis Jackson: Rongo Stalwart

<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/47396556″>Lewis RongoHero</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/passiton”>PassitOn</a&gt; on <a href=”http://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

Gerar Toye: Global Gypsy Gallery Owner

<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/47380207″>GerarToy, Rongo Hero</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/passiton”>PassitOn</a&gt; on <a href=”http://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

Peter Curreen: Permaculture Advisor

<p><a href=”http://vimeo.com/47391904″>Peter Curreen, Rongo Hero</a> from <a href=”http://vimeo.com/passiton”>PassitOn</a&gt; on <a href=”http://vimeo.com”>Vimeo</a&gt;.</p>

Posted in Art, Education, Environment, Funny, Kahurangi National Park, Karamea, LivinginPeace Project, New Zealand, Permaculture, Social Commentary, Travel, Uncategorized, West Coast | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Man Rules

These are our rules!
Please note these are all numbered #1 ON PURPOSE!

1.   Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.  You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.  We need it up, you need it down.  You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1.   Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.  Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.  In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the  other one

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.   Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.  Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say ‘nothing,’ we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, Expect an answer you don’t want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine…REALLY.

1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football or motor sports.

1. You have enough clothes.

1 . You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.  Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight. But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping…

Posted in Education, Funny, Historical, Humor, Humour, Parody, Satire, Social Commentary, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | 3 Comments

The Amazing Art of Jim Denevan

FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/jimdenevanart

Web: http://jimdenevan.com/

Posted in Art, Environment, Photography | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

INSPIRATION: Exhibition by Shota Kawahara

Exhibition by LivinginPeace Project 2011 Resident Artist Shota Kawahara at Re-Invent, Lake Forest Chicago

Posted in Art, Business, Education, Japan, Karamea, LivinginPeace Project, New Zealand, Social Commentary, Travel, Uncategorized, United States | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment